Life when you don't trust people sucks FUKITOL pills

Doesn't that just say it all?  For the 2 years I have been working (7 1/2 years with the same company) with major pain.  I had a workers comp claim started over years ago when the pain first started, was seeing a few doctors for it only to be told after a year of therapy and acupuncture that its just "tennis elbow".  I'm sorry, I call BS!

Tennis elbow do you believe that?  I have had the same and I do mean SAME pain for over 3 years...it has lightened up a little here and there but the pain is CONSTANT. Everyone and I mean EVERYONE I talk to about the pain I have says the SAME thing...Carpal Tunnel.  Not only carpal tunnel, but also Arthritis. So what does this mean for me?  One is correctable by having surgery done, how on Earth do you correct or decrease the pain from Arthritis?

Typing...my job, the only thing in the World I am very qualified for has ruined my life.  What do I do if they decide I can't do it for a living anymore? I'm scared that I will lose my job and not be able to support my kids' needs.  Raising 3 kids is a lot easier than raising 2 adults (both disabled) and 1 child (also disabled) and a husband (who doesn't work) on a small or no income.  I'm scared to death!  My stress level in the past 3 weeks has gone from 50% to 75% with a steady incline due to the recent discovery of my failing drug test for work.  Oh yeah...me...little no drugs almost ever had a dirty test.  Wanna know the funny part?  It was for ibuprofen with codeine...not mine but my oldest son's pain meds.  So I'm fuked if they decide to fire me for a dirty test.  HOW DO I GET MYSELF INTO THIS SPOTS?  Oh yeah, my husband told me if the pain is that bad take this to help ease it...well it didn't ease the pain even a little bit.

I'm waiting to see what corporate says about my dirty test, along with my workers comp (2nd time) claim...should be interesting either way.

Oh P.S.

I have an open account in GoFundMe.  If you would like to donate for any reason, I'm hoping to raise enough money (yes but not for me) to have my dad (who I found 1 year ago) and my brother (who I found a few months ago) come visit me.  It's cheaper to have them come to me than to have my whole family go see them...and I have looked into all forms of travel from Bus, rental car, Train and Airplane.  It is a lot cheaper for them to travel to me...train is about $1500 each round trip plus hotel. I put a small cushion in there just in case they want to do some fun stuff out here with the family. Please take a look and donate if you can or spread the word so others can help.  If you were asking I would help you anyway I could.  Any money left over after the trips will be donated to another person/family in need so the money will not go to waste..  Thank you in advance!

Also, shirts are still being sold...sizes are listed on the shirt page. 

Welcome to 2014

So far this year hasn't been as bad as last year.

Last month we had a scare.  Anthony just after his birthday got sick and just kept getting worse as the days passed.  After a week he was so sick he was throwing up so I called off that day and ended up taking him to the hospital to get chacked out. They kept us there 3 days.  He had gotten some kind of blood infection and it had everyone freaked out.  They still don't know how he got it or how long it had been in his system but it's gone now.  He's back to his normal happy child, making messes all over the place.

The year ended ruff for me, with him being sick, I came home from the hospital and I got sick, my other 2 kids were sick...it was just a bad house to be in.

The season just felt off for me.  I had found out that a dear friend of mine had passed away back in October (didn't find out until after Thanksgiving) and hearing the news put me into a slight depression.  We had never met in person, had always said we were going to but never did.  The last time was because he had gotten sick.  Hearing the news of his death hit a lot of his friends hard.  I had known im for close to 15 years so losing him is hard.  I miss his texts, R.I.P. Tony, you'll never be forgotten.

Along with his passing a few of my online DS families have lost members of their families, including a few children...R.I.P. Little Angels. 

I have reconnected with a few people that have been missing from my life.  1 being my old high school friend, Rebecca (Becky) who just recently cameback to California a few weeks ago.  She's already been over for a small get together...had a great night!

2nd being my best friend from Elementry school and Jr. High.  I had missed her so much, she was like my sister from another mother (her mom and my mom have the same name so we all became close).  I found out that her mom and brother passed away.  I missed out on so much of her life, I'm glad Amy is back even if we haven't seen each other yet.

3rd. The one person I have tried to find for years.  I thought he was dead because I couldn't find any trace of him and trust me I looked for a long time.  I never gave up.  I had found his brother on facebook, sent him a letter (snail mail), no reply and it was never returned. I messaged him on facebook, again no reply. I found this person's son and found out he was still alive.  My heart stopped! Finally after looking for 20 years I found the one person I never should have let go of. Now we talk and its great.